Stop Trying To Please Everyone Will Make You Live Happier

December 3, 2023
Mental Wellness Tips
0 Comments

Stop Trying to Please Everyone. It Will Make You Live Happier and Healthier.

Anyone going through this life wants to be loved and appreciated, but that doesn’t mean we have to please everyone. Happiness comes from living true to who you are.

Have you ever felt tired and heavy when you woke up every morning and feared that you would do something that would make your parents, friends, colleagues…unhappy? Must every gesture, word, and action be cautious for fear of offending others? One of the secrets to living happier is:

Don’t try to please everyone! Because:

1. Everyone Will Always Have An Opinion

No matter what you do or how hard you try, people will always have an opinion about you. Most opinions often carry the color of judgment, evaluation, and even wanting to change your actions and thoughts.

Of course, besides encouragement, constructive comments help you see reality objectively and improve yourself. However, many people express their opinions, even say bad things behind your back, just because they don’t “like” you, maybe out of jealousy or because you have different thoughts and opinions.

In general, you will never be able to prevent other people from having opinions about you, so choose the opinions that are well-intentioned and ignore opinions that are too personal or meaningless to you and your life.

2. No One Can Control Other People’s Emotions

One thing is obvious: our emotions are completely different. You can be a very good, talented person, but they are still unsatisfied. Why is that? There are many answers, but one is that they don’t like you. We will never have enough capacity to control other people’s emotions.

People’s inner world is extremely complex, so from your own subjective perspective, you cannot accurately explain anyone’s emotions. The only thing you can do is “manage” your own mind and heart. Even if they don’t like you, you have to stay calm and try not to pay attention to the negative things. Otherwise, you will not be able to live happily.

3. Different Personal Opinions

“Right” and “wrong” are sometimes subjective. What is right in one person’s mind may be wrong in another’s. Therefore, everyone will have different opinions and perspectives on how to approach a problem.

If you won’t do things their way, then why expect them to be satisfied? We are all unique products of our past experiences. We have different value systems, beliefs, and behavior methods from there. Even someone you think you know quite well can get upset when you do something that you disagree with or that goes against their ideas.

4. Please Everyone, You Will Lose Yourself

If you try to please others all the time, you will go against what you always want in life. After that, you will have to endure torment and obsession for a long time. Things to do and not to do constantly repeat in your mind, making you confused, confused, and even losing the happiness and joy in life.

Don’t let other people’s opinions stop you from doing what you love. If you really want to pursue a dream, even if you fail a few times and people say no, just follow your heart. Only you know your strengths, weaknesses, interests, and ideals. If you follow other personal views, you will lose your freedom and control over your life.

5. Trying to Satisfy Everyone Will Attract Negativity.

Trying to make everyone happy is something that has the potential to get us hurt over and over again. Some not-so-nice people will try to take advantage of your enthusiasm for personal gain.

Sometimes, the person you love the most says the worst things about you. If you keep being sad and trying to make them happy, you will nurture a negative emotion yourself, which you should never do.

You always try to please others, but they never care or appreciate, so all your efforts are similar to “riding the sand of the East Sea.” They will never treat you well, no matter how much you try.

If someone doesn’t want to see the real you or know who you are, why would you waste your time proving how great you are? Life is short; love someone who is willing to accept your original self, stay by your side, support, and share when you encounter difficulties. Don’t let toxic relationships hold sway over your happiness.

How Please Others Affect Your Mental Health?

While wanting to please others is a natural and often positive aspect of human interaction, constantly seeking approval or prioritizing others’ needs over your own can negatively affect your mental health.

It’s essential to balance being considerate of others and caring for your well-being. Here are some ways that always wanting to please others might impact mental health:

Burnout: Constantly striving to meet others’ expectations or make others happy without taking time for self-care can lead to burnout. This can result in exhaustion, both physically and mentally.

Low Self-Esteem: If your self-worth heavily depends on others’ approval, it can contribute to low self-esteem. Relying on external validation may make you feel inadequate if you perceive that you’re not meeting others’ expectations.

Anxiety: The fear of disappointing others or being rejected can lead to anxiety. Always seeking approval may result in heightened stress and worry about how others perceive you.

Neglecting Personal Needs: Constantly prioritizing others may lead to neglecting your own needs and desires. Over time, this can have a negative impact on your overall well-being.

Lack of Authenticity: Continuously trying to please others may lead to a lack of authenticity in your interactions. You might suppress your true feelings or opinions to align with what you think others want.

Difficulty Setting Boundaries: Always wanting to please others can make setting and maintaining healthy boundaries challenging. This can lead to feelings of being overwhelmed and taken advantage of.

How Do You Change Yourself and Stop Trying to Please Everyone?

Changing the habit of constantly trying to please everyone is a process that involves self-awareness, self-acceptance, and setting healthy boundaries. Here are some steps to help you shift this pattern:

1. Self-awareness:

Know yourself: Understand what you like, what matters to you, and what you want.
- Notice habits: Pay attention to times when you’re doing things just to make others happy.

2. Acceptance:

It’s okay not to please everyone: Realize that it’s impossible to make everyone happy, and that’s normal.
- You’re not perfect, and that’s fine: Accept that you’re not perfect, and that’s totally okay.

3. Set priorities:

Know what’s important to you: Figure out what matters most to you.
- Focus on what matters: Concentrate on the most important things to you in life.

4. Learn to say no:

Don’t be afraid to say no: It’s okay to say no if something doesn’t work for you.
- Set boundaries: Know your limits and be clear about them.

5. Establish boundaries:

Decide what’s okay and what’s not: Determine what you’re comfortable with and not.
- Tell people your limits: Let others know what you’re okay with and what you’re not.

6. Focus on self-improvement:

Learn new things: Find things you enjoy and get better at them.
- Feel good about yourself: You’ll feel more confident as you get better at things.

7. Seek support:

Talk to friends or family: Share your feelings with people you trust.
- Get help if needed: Consider talking to a professional if things are tough.

8. Practice self-compassion:

Be kind to yourself: Treat yourself like you would treat a good friend.
- Learn from mistakes: Instead of feeling bad, see what you can learn from your mistakes.

9. Celebrate your uniqueness:

Be proud of who you are: Celebrate what makes you special.
- Don’t compare yourself to others: Everyone is different, and that’s good.

10. Monitor your self-talk:

Think positive: When you think something negative, try to replace it with something positive.
- Surround yourself with positivity: Do things that bring you joy and think positive thoughts.

Conclusion

In short, the sooner you accept the fact that you cannot please everyone around you, the sooner you will have a peaceful and happy life. We can’t make the whole world like us, just like we can’t like everyone.

It’s important to balance caring for others with taking care of yourself. Building confidence and putting your well-being first can improve your mental health. If wanting to please others affects your well-being, talking to friends, family, or a mental health pro can help. Don’t forge to visit Mentalmapguide for more support and resources.